“Nearly two months? You haven’t posted in nearly two months?! That’s blog death…”
No, I haven’t died and neither has my blog. I promise. Though I do admit that I have been silent for too long. (In more than one way…)
Quite a few people have been asking me lately what’s taking so long in regards to Fading Echoes. After all, in this day and age of self-publishing, I should be able to pop them out left and right… right? Well, not so much. The respect for how long it (can) take/s to write a novel may have gone out the door with all the brilliant authors who can produce them quickly (hats off to you, good authors), that hasn’t changed how long it takes me to write a novel.
I started as a full time student in July, and things have kept quick pace since then. Out of school hours work time is, admittedly, more than I expected. I am usually very introverted, as I have social anxiety up to the point where I have needed to be walked to class a few times and have had to leave class early a couple times due to panic. All of this has left me quite exhausted.
Beyond that, we come to the grit of the issue: depression.
I have struggled with depression since I was a teenager, fearing those dark spaces in my mind and feeling the utter hopelessness that is deep depression. I know what it’s like to start questioning what the point of it all is and fearing that there might not be one.
As much as I have managed it, there are still times when I am deep in depression and cry when I look at my work because I feel it is so bad. I have enough self-control not to delete anything when in those moods, but I certainly don’t get any writing done during those times.
I by no means want this to be a post about “I was gone from blogging so long because…” nor a rant about anything in particular. I more want to say, “I’m here.” I understand the authors who, despite the instant nature of self-publishing, still take longer to write their novels. I understand the authors who have times when they can’t bear to look at their work lest they delete the lot.
I’m here, and I understand. You’re not alone. And, sometimes, knowing that is the best news out there.